The Naked Valentine
With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, and the perfunctory media blitz that accompanies it, we tend to think about love more often. While I’ve never been a fan of advertisement driven Hallmark Holidays, I will say that this is a great time for couples to do something really special for one another. But when I say special, I mean something original. Something completely YOURS that you give to him or her, maybe along with the flowers or other material gift.
How about writing a poem to the one you love?
When I say poem, I mean it in the broadest sense of the word possible. It doesn’t have to rhyme. It can be one brief sentence or it can be a few pages long. Stream of consciousness. Free form word association. Whatever works for you.
Steal a few quiet moments with a picture of the person you love. Put on some music that reminds you of them, and write down what comes up. The best of what comes up, mind you. If you’re going to mention that he drinks out of the carton and it drives you nuts, do it with lots of affectation and humor. Even in a difficult relationship, there are plenty of wonderful things to write about. Focus on that and see what happens.
The poem can be soft, or sexy, or romantic, or raunchy, or anything. Get to that place in you that wants to speak to him or her at that moment. And run with it. Or shift gears in the middle if all of sudden you go from feeling horny to feeling sentimental. It doesn’t matter. If you follow your heart, whatever you write will be just as it is supposed to be. And don’t forget to title the poem. That gives it a more epic quality, even if, or especially if, it’s only one line.
The beauty is that you don’t have to be a good writer to do this. All you have to do is be literate, which, demos monstrata, you are if you’re reading this.
The hard part will probably be overcoming your fear of doing it. Whenever we share from the heart in such a naked fashion, like a poem, our fears of rejection, abandonment, unworthiness, etc. get triggered. “What if they don’t like it? What if they think it’s a stupid gift? What if the poem’s no good?” All these questions and thousands more can run trough our mind and scare us out of doing it.
I encourage you to take this risk. It’s worth it. Because what you’ll end up with is something completely yours. Something completely from your heart. That makes it unique. That makes it special. That makes it precious.
If it just feels too hard to do, try doing it but with no intention of actually giving it to your lover. This often removes some of the fear and allows us to write more freely. And the irony is that if you write with no intention of giving it, you usually end up with something that you like so much you want to share it. Kind of like playing a trick on yourself where everybody ends up smiling.
I’m going to share something I wrote a while ago for somebody who’s never seen it, and probably never will. But that doesn’t diminish it’s value. Because the real value in writing is the writing. Sharing it, with one other or with the whole world, certainly adds something different to the experience. Sharing what you write transforms the experience of what happens after you write it but does not affect the value of what was written or the experience of writing it. Writing it will always be what it is: Magic.
So give the one you love a little magic this year.
But buy the flowers too, just to cover your ass.
the most beautiful scared
if i could lay next to you
and press my forehead against yours
and look into your eyes from that close
i would see beyond your pretty face
i would see through your captivating eyes
i would see into you
i would see the you that loves me
i would see that
the you that loves me
is the most beautiful you of all
and i would see that
the you that loves me
is scared
and i would say
to the most beautiful scared
i’m scared too
i would say to the most beautiful scared
you are not all alone inside there
because i am in there with you
and you are in here with me
i would say to the most beautiful scared
please don’t hide from me
please don’t act out of being afraid
because if you do then you will
lash out at me
or push me away
and hurt me
because that’s what we do to those we love
when we’re scared
i would say to the most beautiful scared
even if you do that to me
i will understand
i will not run
i will still love you
because you
my most beautiful scared
already have my heart
i’ve given it to you
even though i’m just as scared
and when i was through
i would know that
your most beautiful scared
and my most beautiful scared
wouldn’t feel as afraid
or as alone
as they did before we
pressed our foreheads against one another’s
and looked into each other’s eyes from that close
and saw into each other
saw our most beautiful scared
©2009 Clint Piatelli. All Rights (and a box of chocolates full of Wrongs) Reserved.
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